She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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