Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Randomize
