Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
