we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Is Oprah even human
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
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