...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
