You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
