I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
