Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize