i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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