That's intense
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
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