You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
