i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize
