we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
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