Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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