You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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