Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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