His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
