He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
