That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
