Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
