I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Nicole vs. Life
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
