I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Randomize
