im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
