Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Randomize
