I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Randomize
