i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
