I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Dignity is for republicans.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
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