we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
