I can text with my tongue
I don't think brook has ever known best
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
