If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Randomize
