I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I have post one night stand depression
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
