Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
