I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Randomize