I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
