So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
I need a beard to bite.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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