I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Randomize
