Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
