if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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