But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Randomize
