If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
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