Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
