Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
