DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
