I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Randomize
