thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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