He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
