I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Randomize
