Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
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