I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
being pregnant is like rehab
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
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