dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
